Tuesday, January 02, 2024

2024!

Welcoming another year.

I mostly felt overwhelmed, good kind of overwhelmed. What's with work and climbing and Aran's wedding, thus having to find another house again. 

All are things I'm happy with/I love, but they still overwhelmed me. 

But mainly I'm trying to actively improve my health, cos I really want to do my best at my job and of course maintain my climbing life.

I still have all these racing thoughts in my head. Event though I'm no longer sad, (serotonin levels getting better) but I truly have no patience to write anymore, BUT still I wanna write at least something in this blog. not letting it die anytime soon. I mean no more word vomit. 

Being self aware and being in Tik Tok era, (information overload), few words that keeps popping up in my feed is 'adhd' and 'high cortisol level', been researching about it and keeps seeing , Magnesium deficiency, L-Theanine/Tyrosine, Probiotic, Ayurveda herbs etc.
So lets see if we can try to work on that this year, and see if could improve my focus cognitive function as well.  

HNY!

Thursday, December 14, 2023

37!

 OK to be honest, this is the year that I'm finally admitting that I'm growing old. No more denying.



Firstly because this year 100% ppl will call me kak already, and the lowest age I can tell people without they second guessing is 29.

I mean my Enercon US boss did thought I was 26 (when I said 36) but then again he's American.

And Opah Anjang did ask if I'm still in school(uni) but she's almost 90 and in poor health. (God bless her.)

So both doesn't count.   

And then there's the grey hair. 

The amount of grey hair I see this year is alarming. Chaoi literally have to sit for 20mins to pluck those obvious ones protruding on the top of my head. Not accounting those at the side of my forhead.


And then there's climbing, While strength wise I thought getting better, fitness wise, I can silently admit I'm getting breathless when I do endurance.

I used to refused to admit that I cant climb better bcos I'm old cos obviously I climb better than most ppl in their 20s.

Also I cant say that cos I literally started climbing at 29. Actively training at 33. 

Unless I have been climbing since Im 16, I'm not gonna say I'm too old for this shit.


BUT, 

this year, I think I can say that, (though I still will not) because I have been climbing hard for 4-5 years now. There is some if not a lot of differences I can feel in my fitness level. 


But I'm still hopeful. and I wanna see how far I can go still.

If those Korean aunties can still climb 7c at 40-50yrs why cant I?

So HB to me!


Wednesday, September 06, 2023

Friday, May 19, 2023

Vietnam Trip 2023 - Photo Dump

Was feeling down, monthly dopamine dip biasalahkan, 😒



















When I read my last post rasa grateful pulak, tula manusia senang sangat lupa benda2 best, benda2 xbest je yg nk difocuskan. Anywho, dumping my recent Vietnam trip photos here as part of my gratitude towards life. Random gila trip last minute. But Alhamdulillah.

Also, who knows Chaoi is actually a great photographer!😍

Saturday, April 15, 2023

Psyche! New post.

haha just dont want to leave that last post in a bitter note.

Actually life has been good. moving in an upward direction hopefully, as it has been stagnant for about a decade.

Just probably not in the way I expected it to be. 

But like we always heard many times throughout our life, when God takes something from you, its because He wants to give you something better I guess. Something that you dont know is better for you.

Been busy with work and excited about it (that makes huge difference). Not on Prozac anymore and feels okay about it. I'm really digging my short hair look nowadays. Managed  to find a way to climb consistently still, new timing new partner, new project hopefully.  InsyaAllah if ada rezeki will travel again soon. And I have TWO Nurita Harith pieces for raya this year. TWO!

Uni me must be so happy.

So lifes (finally) getting good I guess. InsyaAllah. Syukur. 


Friday, March 17, 2023

 I seriously have no feeling to write anymore despite many things still in my head. But I think its a transition. A good one hopefully. A transition of how my brain works. Maybe if I can not be too focus of whats inside my head, I can focus more on whats outside. The reality. The things that actually matters and needs more focus on. So maybe this would be the last post in a long time. Hopefully.

 

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